ABER EXPANDS AT GREATEST RATE YET

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Chief Editor of the "Real Aber Times" and part time volunteer journalist at "the real real Aber Times" Somtyn "Smells" Kyndafunki

IN A STUNNING TURN OF EVENTS, THE ABERYSTWYTH LOCALITY HAS INCREASED MASSIVELY ALMOST OVERNIGHT.

By Sometyn Kyndafunki, Editor of The Real Aber Times, in Aberaneous, Friday 2nd September

Prior to July, the population of Aberystwyth was roughly 10,000 people, since then those number have dramatically increased.

Prior to July, Tokyo, at 2,000km squared and with a population of 13,620,000 was regarded as the largest city on Earth. However, it has emerged that the Aberystwyth population has increased to well over 182,284,000.

This sudden and significant change came as part of Aber Times’ expansion online. The local newspaper uses local websevers and technicians based in Lagos, Nigeria while its head offices are based in London.

With its only paid staff living outside the Greater Aberystwyth area, questions must be asked about the viability of Aber Times’ staff commuting from Aberystwyth’s suburbs in Abuja into its heart on the Ceredigion coast (roughly 4,500 km).

Aberystwyth Times Chief Executive Managing Editor in Charge said “We are one planet.

AberTimes is part of a global media project called earth times although I’m thinking of renaming earth HawkWorld maybe so HawkWorld Times?” thereby exposing his own plans for global domination in the latest in a series of “damaging revelations”.

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